"I" Message
When you want to let someone know that their behavior is bothering you, an “I” message is the best way. Usually people send a “you” message through which they blame or criticize the other person, causing the other person to react defensively and not hear the concern. The steps to making an “I” message are:
1) State your feeling about the other person’s behavior and be specific about it.
(“I feel worried when you are late and you don’t call me.”)
2) Ask what you would like them to do differently.
(“I would like you to call me when you’ll be more than 15 minutes late.”)
3) State what you will do if they do or do not honor your request. This is optional.
(“If you call and warn me you’ll be late, I won’t ground you for the next night.”)